When I completed my undergraduate studies, I thought that that was the last I saw of men who begged in the name of being students. I was so wrong.

In the past few months, I have had several calls by several people asking for money because they are broke, and they are students and I am supposed to have found work now that I am graduated. This work package is supposed to bring along the freedom of being filthy rich.

Now, these men are no different with the beggars with plastic cups at whatever street in Nairobi. They are worse, because they borrow with an assumption that you already have and it is their right, as children of the country, to be given. Reality check misters, you cease becoming a child when you are done with high school. And even in high school, you were a child to your parents, ONLY. I have no intention of giving birth to boys who already know where Sabina joy is or where to find the second mouth of that woman older than my grandmother that I see you moving around with.

Truth is no one cares whether you are a male prostitute, a beggar or an idiot with too many books and grand buildings around him. No one cares whether you will die today or whether you will continue living to utilize the tax payer’s money as you go for those condoms at the hostel toilets or those herpes medications at your school’s health unit.

Bottom line is; you have too many girlfriends. I saw the lifestyle that most of you college men chose. You have twenty girlfriends to show how macho you are to your friends, right? Well, you can have them. But that victim case of being a university student stopped working a long time ago. No one cares whether you go to campus or to a village technical center. Everyone in Kenya today is a graduate. We all know what happens inside those walls. We know that the only time you will be seen in class is during cats and exams. We know that you spend more time drunk than you spend in the library. We know that Google has become your best friend only second to a cup of country beer. We know that you will ask for money from everyone on your phone so you can be able to attend The Circle, Masaku 7’s (and all other 7’s), blankets and wine and be at the carnivore every Tuesday because some comedian is acting: all so you can show out that you belong to this flashy society: the middle class.

Well, let us call you an idiot. Don’t get offended. The reason you are an idiot is that you are practically a beggar with style. You don’t need a thermos lid to be labeled so. You are asking for money. You are no middle class. You are not rich. And you are a prostitute. You don’t have to have a vagina to be a prostitute. You only need to sleep with more than three women in a day. And those ten older women you counter deal, what category do they classify you in? A twat maybe? Did I hear love? What the heck is that? Do you own a dictionary? Your English sucks. You seriously need to invest in an English class or at least purchase a dictionary. Using big words you have no idea what they mean because you heard some media personality use them, does not mean that you know English nor emphasize the idea of you being in a university.

We all know that you are a university student not a student at the university. Everyone can be a university student, a prostitute, a beggar and an idiot. We chose to be students at the university, responsible, innovative and experimental. That is why we are who we are. That is why we wear a label of success in your eyes. In reality, we spend sleepless nights trying to figure out what our next step will be, where we went wrong to register such big loses as we have now and how to manage that to bring our businesses back on track. Maybe make them better. We don’t sell ourselves; and we could. We choose to use our brains over our cunts.

You said you are doing a business related course? Well, I don’t think you have ever heard of this thing called investment. Come to think about it, you have a loan called HELB every beginning of the semester, you have at your disposal your whore wages and you have your parental allowance too. What do you do with them? Drink. I thought so. Well, visit your bank or attend educative forums. Maybe this ones will help you open up that empty mass in your head because books are not helping you any.

Too much bile? I am not near the half of it, but I will be courteous enough to stop here. Try not to provoke me anymore; you might not hear the end of it.


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