Dear Journal,
Long time no talk, ah? Well, sorry that I found a new friend but maybe you will always be my best friend so, LOTTA! Let’s get that bottle of white wine out.
I was wondering what I will do today (after waking up at noon with a very big smile for waking up early!) when I decided to read. I opened my calibre eBook organizer but I had no idea which book to read. Apparently, someone has been tampering with my reader following my recent love with bookshops and paperback materials. You got to agree, the touch and smell of a new book is addictive but the feel of soft paper beneath your fingers as you caress the book page by page is thrilling and erotic! All the same, someone tampered. It got me mad because they added a whole bookshop of silly materials like The Art of Female Organism, The Art of Seduction and Perfecting Anal Sex…Jesus! Who the hell wants to read those?
Before you answer that, let us be clear here. There is nothing wrong with anal sex as long as I am not the one doing it, I have no problem with reaching an organism (in fact, if you can make me come all through our sexcapade, I will marry you instantly) and I have no problem with being seduced as long as I can tolerate your breath and your manners are agreeable, but I have no interest in reading what someone thinks is the perfect way of doing this things because they worked for them. Fact is, I love the Italian way of seduction and the Mexican romantism, but hey, I live in Kenya and the closest you can get near Mexican romance and Italian seduction is by dating a Luo! Maasai and kikuyu men have no idea of what foreplay is; well they did not know until they started reading The G-spot, Men 101 and Glamour Magazines! Luhya men will buy you chicken then climb you like a horse and kalenjin men will get you running a sex marathon!
Well, the point is my calibre eBook organizer has been tampered with and now I get to read all manner of boring stuffs like How to Pass an Interview, How to Write a CV and A Resume That Sells. As I was skimming through How to Command an Interview, I found a list that listed qualities of a bad interviewer.
They catapulted (yes, the luo bug got to me thanks to @omnoel) to what I like to refer to as my last interview. I had had a previous phone interview with a certain Mr. Kinuthia. They had announced a vacancy for rock climbing guides. I have magnet particles that keep attaching me to dangerous activities. So I applied for the sheer need to dance with danger and date one Mr. Risk. I passed the phone interview and was scheduled for a physical interview. However, Mr. Kinuthia could not make it. I found one Mr. Kariuki. He kept talking, rarely giving me space to answer his questions. He kept probing about my personal life and completely avoided my professional life. He was pissed off when I said am a monotheist and not a Christian. He got mad when I challenged his gospel of Jesus and told him to give me a difference between talking to the wind and talking to an unseen being that is purportedly present in and around over 40 billion people all over the world at the same time. He got bitchy when I said I can do anything other than swim. Through some miracle I cannot explain, I became amused and started giving very skimpy details. I knew I did not have the job the moment our religious views crashed. Apparently, my choice of religion is a basis for denial of a job I am highly competent at.
I have no objection to what he did. My major point is: He is a very bad interviewer. I don’t see why my personal life or my religious beliefs have to be the basis of a professional interview or why my professional life was not interrogated at all. It was done though and I left feeling very pleased with myself for challenging him and making the interview about him and not about me. I hope that confidence stays with me forever. Amen.
As the day progresses, I will get rid of those materials I can only consider as rubbish (or what do we call things we have no use for?) probably get some better-worth-my-time reads.
Sorry about the title. (How else would I have got your attention?) Have a blessed day.

yours @_Mimoh_

wanjiru’s world

 

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2 thoughts on “PERFECTING THE ART OF PROSTITUTION!

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